The nuanced aroma of old man

I've found that there's an interesting dichotomy in the way men use cologne and how it relates to their age. Young men wear cologne that tends to resemble radioactive air freshener, as confirmed by the large sample space of said hominids at Illinois. Most of these, of course, were unwillingly sampled due to the sheer offensive quality of Frat Boy Funk.

Older men smell like treasure you find in the attic. I don't know if there's some sort of catalog you get after you turn 50 or if they hand the stuff out or what. I'll be darned if I didn't walk into the bathroom at work this week and (expecting the usual bathroom odors--that's a topic for another day) think that I was going to come across some sweet trunk full of wicked awesome old photos and clothes and stuff. I thought to myself, "there was an old guy in here not too long ago."

As for me, I'll stick with my deodorant, thank you very much.

Please note: this apparently does not apply to women, who smell good all the time.